Les blanches exotiques

   It can be taken for granted that in normal culture, teachers are respected, fairly compensated, and are treated well. I have discovered that in exotic American culture, teachers and scholars are met with distrust and are often accused of elitism and of being incompetent in nearly everything. It makes no matter to the exotics that teachers begin their days before sunrise, spend many hours on their feet, use their breaks to be hall monitors, deal with students who need extra help or have trouble at home, grade papers late into the night, buy classroom supplies with their own money, and lecture to over a hundred kids a day. No, in fact, in exotic white culture, it has become something of a sport to make the lives of educators as difficult as possible.

There is, however, a way for teachers to gain some recognition and appreciation for their work. In white culture, there is often an award given to a single teacher for an entire year, called “The Teacher of the Year” award, which can only be assumed to mean that the “Teacher of the Year” gets to officiate over holidays and parades throughout the school year. We have reliable intelligence that tells us that prestigious gifts to the “Teacher of the Year” are a certificate verifying their status for the school year, a book of coupons, and a giftcard to a local restaurant. The most covetous gift, however, is a parking spot (whites drive cars to get everywhere) that has “Teacher of the Year” painted on it. This parking spot is often several spots over from the school’s “principal’s” parking spot, meaning that on a good day, the Teacher of the Year can make a quick getaway after the school bell rings, or, on bad days, is the perfect trap for the principal to corner and speak with the teacher (the latter is less likely, the school principle often only stays part of the day unless something as important as sport should be on the schedule in the evening.)

So how does one become “Teacher of the Year” in white culture? There is no exact formula, but research has provided some clues. Namely, a teacher must have been teacher for more than five years at the school. The teacher will likely not teach any arts or enrichment classes, since whites often shun any activity that does not provide immediate cash flow for their God of Capitalism. A “coach” who works part time as a teacher, so that he or she may “coach” an afterschool activity (American football or cheerleading) is often eligible for this award. The most important criteria of a teacher hoping for the Award is to never rock the boat, a phrase which means “don’t question the administration or teach in a way that isn’t wrote, boring, mindnumbing, or produces independent thinkers, fore this angers the Capitalist God”

Needless to say, the way white American culture treats their educators is truly bizarre!